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At the dinner table, Mpho forces a smile as her friends recount their latest adventures – weekend hikes, late-night concerts, spontaneous road trips. She used to be the one leading the charge, always the first to say yes. Now, exhaustion weighs heavy in her bones, but she swallows it down, nodding along, laughing at the right moments. The mask is automatic, well-practiced. It smooths over the discomfort of admitting that she no longer feels like the person they expect her to be.

At work, she is decisive, sharp, the one who thrives under pressure. But lately, the effort of simply showing up drains her in ways she cannot explain. The fatigue lingers long after rest, the aches settle deep, and the once-familiar rhythm of her life feels distant, like a song she can no longer dance to. She tells herself it’s temporary. That pushing through it will make it true.

Later, in the solitude of her apartment, Mpho sighs, staring at her reflection. Who is she now? The woman who commands attention in boardrooms, the one who pretends to be fine among friends, or the body she inhabits – slower, uncertain, betraying her at every turn? Each version of herself is real, yet none feel entirely true. She wonders if she is disappearing, breaking into too many pieces to recognise.

Mpho is not alone in this struggle. Many of us shape our identities to fit the spaces we enter, adapting our language, posture, and even emotions to meet unspoken expectations. But what happens when the performance never stops? When authenticity itself feels like an act of rebellion?

The Work of Identity in Multi-Context Environments

Identity is fluid, shaped by the environments we navigate. While it is well understood that people adapt their identities to fit different contexts, less attention is given to the emotional and psychological strain this places on individuals. The struggle for authenticity is not simply about “being yourself” – it is about negotiating who you are in spaces that demand different versions of you.

Academic research provides valuable insights into how identity is constructed in different interactional spaces. Guise, Widdicombe, and McKinlay (2007) examined how individuals with Myalgic Encephalomyelitis/Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (ME/CFS) describe their condition across computer-mediated and face-to-face environments. Their findings highlight how participants strategically construct their illness as serious and legitimate to counteract societal skepticism. Similarly, Guise, McVittie, and McKinlay (2010) explored how ME/CFS sufferers discuss their medical interactions online, showing how they carefully manage their complaints to avoid negative attributions of being ‘difficult’ patients.

These studies illustrate how identity is not just something we have – it is something we perform, shaped by external validation and societal norms. While this adaptability is necessary for social survival, it can also lead to feelings of inauthenticity and fragmentation.

The Struggle for Authenticity

The pressure to present different aspects of oneself in different contexts can create a crisis of authenticity. Many people, like Mpho, struggle with the fear that they are performing rather than living. This is especially true in environments that impose rigid expectations – whether in professional settings, cultural spaces, or even personal relationships.

However, what if authenticity does not mean being the same in all contexts, but rather embracing the full spectrum of who we are? Instead of resisting the multiplicity of our identities, we can find ways to integrate them, ensuring that each version remains aligned with our core values and beliefs.

Moving Towards a Liberated Identity

The solution is not to abandon adaptation altogether – after all, human interaction is built on social cues and context-awareness. However, there are ways to integrate authenticity into these shifting identities without losing oneself entirely:

Recognising the Mask: Acknowledging that we wear different masks in different settings is the first step. Rather than seeing these shifts as betrayals of the self, we can understand them as necessary social tools.

Defining Core Values: While behaviours may change depending on the context, core values should not. Identifying what truly matters – integrity, kindness, creativity – allows for flexibility while maintaining authenticity.

Choosing When to Challenge Norms: Not every space will be welcoming to an unfiltered self. However, recognising moments where authenticity can be safely expressed, even in small ways, builds confidence and resilience.

Creating Spaces for True Expression: If certain environments stifle authenticity, seeking or building spaces where full expression is encouraged can be a radical form of self-preservation. Communities, friendships, and even online platforms can serve as sanctuaries for the unfiltered self.

In The End, “Who am I?”

In a world that demands both adaptation and authenticity, the struggle for identity is ongoing. Guise et al.’s (2010) study highlights the careful balancing act many undertake to navigate systems that do not fully accommodate them. The key to thriving in multi-context environments is not to reject adaptation, but to ensure that adaptation does not become self-erasure. To be authentic in a world that resists it is an act of quiet revolution – one that, if embraced collectively, has the power to shift cultural norms toward greater acceptance of the full spectrum of human identity.

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